In Pursuit of the Perfect Pizza

Olivia Murphy & Courtney Theo
Jul 10, 2017
6 min read

We don't know about you, but when we think of Chicago, we think pizza.

(And seriously, if you don't like Chicago-style pizza, you're lying. Because that means you don't like extra bread and extra cheese and that means you're insane. Just sayin'.)

As much as we love our Giordano's and Lou Malnati's, Chicago is lined with original pizza aficionados. You just have to take a bite.

These are our top 4 choices but know that the options are truly endless.

1. Homeslice

Schulz's BBQ Bird (roasted chicken, red onions, green peppers, pepperoncinis, diced romas, cilantro, mozzarella, provolone & barbecue sauce — $12) with a Brooklyn Summer Ale.

This place holds a special place in our hearts, but mostly stomachs.

With the perfect ratio of toppings to homemade crust, Homeslice has a pie for everyone. From vegetarian, to meat lovers, to gluten-free, this place dominates for the "I just want one slice" eater and the "I can eat this whole pizza by myself just watch me" eater alike. (We're all for the latter.) Seriously, this place has like a thousand pizza renditions, even the pickiest of eaters will be able to get exactly what they want—even the online menu boasts, "Pardon all the scrolling. You'll thank us 30 pizzas later."

Inside's decor is fixed for every Instagram-lover's dream with a red neon sign reading, "I could give up pizza, but I'm not a quitter" right when you walk in. Outside is just the same: a sign reading every Midwesterner's fantasy, "Put some ranch on it," and a scrappy "Chicago" sign hang in the patio. From actual swings to booths, customers can lounge outside in the "backyard" and order craft beers (our favorite is the Brooklyn Summer Ale) or their special spicy Pomarita margarita.

Since this is a gem of a pizza place that lets you order a personal pizza instead of sharing with your friends, totals come out to be pretty cheap (a 10-inch pizza is $12). I mean you can share, but don't you want your own to devour? We certainly do. Trust us, when you get Schulz's BBQ Bird pizza, you'll want to treat yoself.

Pro tip: Homeslice doesn't take reservations, and at around 5 p.m. they card you at the door. More importantly, on nice nights they let Gary, the bulldog, run around the patio. And he's a nugget.

Lincoln Park - 938 W Webster Ave

2. Parlor Pizza Bar

I fell in love with Fulton Market about 3 years ago when I discovered Parlor Pizza Bar. It fits a lot of criteria that people always ask for in a restaurant recommendations. So it's my go-to rec for the following reasons!

The usual criteria goes as follows:

Good ambience
Outdoor seating/rooftop (#summer18)
Good for big groups
Happy hour heaven

You can be on an intimate date at the pizza bar watching the chefs spin pizza into the wood-fired oven. You can be with a large group on the rooftop drinking Moscow Mules and playing ping pong. Currently, I'm at the stage in my life where I'm ordering margs or mules on the roof but I hope to one day make it to the pizza counter with a lover boy. Pray for me.

Burrata Be Kidding Me pizza (fresh mozzarella, imported burrata, baby arugula, house lemon vinaigrette, and white truffle oil — $18), Kale & Artichoke Dip (red pepper, garlic cream and bread crumbs. Served with garlic toast — $11), Fried gelato (Salted caramel gelato, coated in Cinnimon Toast Crunch with caramel sauce, whipped cream, and fresh strawberries — $9).

Picture of pizza taken from PPB's website.

This place is notorious for their witty pizza names like "Cheesus, Mary, and Joseph," "Sgt. Peppers," and the "Notorious F.I.G."

I've ventured here for a happy hour after work and it's probably the biggest crowd I've yet to come across for a happy hour. BUT THIS IS A GOOD THING! There's nothing more depressing than drinking after work by yourself so the crowd is welcome.

It's important to note that the appetizers and salads are a must here. In fact, dare I say, they're more the reason to go here than the pizza. I invite you to go out into the field and report back to me.

Pro Tip: Ask the hostess to sit in the bar in the back. You get a front row showing to watch them make the brick oven pizzas #bts. Also, you GOTTA order the fried carmel ice cream (carmel ice cream, fried in Cinnamon Toast Crunch, drizzled with carmel sauce, a dollop of whipped cream and some sliced strawbs. *standing ovation*)

West Loop - 1824 W Division St

3. Happy Camper

If you're a country gal turned city slicker, Happy Camper will surely make you feel like the best of both worlds. They bring the outside in with some funky and groovy air streamers (like legit campers people used in the 70s), starry lights, a pergola with ivy, and even a tire swing. It's literally like having a backyard party at your weird uncle's house, but instead you're in the middle of Old Town with your work friends eating the most amazing pizza concoctions ever (your weird uncle can come, too).

Similar to Homeslice, this place lets you order a small pie for cheap ($10-$12) and can even make your crust whole-wheat or gluten-free. And just to be fun, they title all their pizzas a real-person name: Tony, Grandma, Benjamin, Curt, Mike, Josh, Linda, and Mary just to name a few.

Jalapeño Homies (Jalapeño, cream cheese, bacon, cheddar, tomato, BBQ sauce — $8), Ed pizza (roasted chicken, bacon, spinach, red onions, roasted garlic, diced romas, parmesan & cream cheese, whole wheat crust — $13), Tony pizza (Prosciutto, spinach, caramelized onion, sundried tomato, balsamic, goat cheese & cream cheese, whole wheat crust — $13).

For me, bring on the Ed! Roasted chicken, bacon, spinach, red onions, roasted garlic, diced romas, with a parmesan & cream cheese sauce—ya really can't go wrong. I was tempted to try a pizza with a nontraditional marinara sauce, and I kid you not, I don't know if I can go back to it after this parm and cream sauce, it is KILLER. They also have ranch-based sauces because we are Chicago and put ranch on darn well anything.

They also have crazy good appetizers. The most popular are their jalapeño "homies," and they are like little scrumptious jalapeño boats. They carve out the seeds and use the pepper to house cream cheese, bacon, American cheese, and diced tomatoes. They also have BBQ sauce on the side which was the ultimate topper for this popper. Couldn't recommend this dish more: It's creamy, spicy, and crunchy, and a perfect way to start your meal. Plus it makes you feel like a kid out camping, that may have been the cocktail talking, but it's nostalgic with every bite.

All in all, we came as hungry bloggers, but we left as very happy campers.

Pro Tip: Whole wheat crusts ($1 more) can only be applicable to smalls and mediums, and gluten-free is only for smalls ($3 more)! PS. Campers must be 21+ to enter unless accompanied by a parent or legal guardian past a certain time (like Homeslice).

Old Town - 1209 N. Wells St.

4. Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder

Half-pounder pizza pot pie (sicilan crust, secret meat sauce, button mushrooms, brick cheese — $12.75), Chef's salad (lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, green and black olives, pepperoncini, onions, artichoke hearts, and green peppers — $8.50), Mediterranean bread ($8.75).

Picture of Half-pounder taken from CPOG's website.

Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder is an almost fairy tale-like experience in a more Pirates of the Caribbean way. This totally has to do with the ambience. When you see it, you'll know. Low ceilings. Dimmed lighting. Dark wood. Lanterns. It gets even better. They don't take reservations because they're CPOG and CPOG can do whatever they want so they have one of the manager/owner guys (honestly who knows, they're so under the table it's insane) memorize your party and will probably say it's an hour and a half wait. It is never, in fact, that long of a wait. Also, are you freaking out that he didn't write your name down? Yeah that's because these guys see your face for a second, memorize it, and in the crowd of 30 people can correctly memorize the order of people waiting. Skill.

Now on to the food. I mean, I basically just want to tell you what to order. So here it goes:

To start you need to get the Mediterranean Bread and the Chef's salad (pictured above). You could get just that and be satisfied, but why not stuff yourself, right?

Obviously, you come here for their famous pizza pot pie. If it's just two of you I would get The Half-Pounder ($12.75). IMPORTANT: YOU DON'T NEED A FULL POT PIE FOR YOURSELF. I PINKY PROMISE. EVEN A FOOTBALL PLAYER COULDN'T FINISH ONE ALONE. Sorry for screaming back there. It's important you know this because they will try to get each person to order their own. Unnecessary.

This place is magical and kinda lets you forget about reality for an hour or two. Stay a while.

Pro-tip: They only take cash!

Lincoln Park - 2121 N Clark St

As a wise man once said, "There ain't no party like a pizza party." I think Abe Lincoln said that, he was super honest after all.